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Friday, October 30, 2009
Slice Slice away this little piece of my memory --
Because I still remembered him. And I hate it. I just want to move on, and reach to a stage where I don't give a damn of whatever may happen to him -- because right now, I really hoped that he lives in misery. Like - seriously. Posted at 10:30 pm by d.a.s.h Make a comment Permalink Wednesday, September 23, 2009
answer 001 I kept asking myself, why do I hate him so much up to the point that I managed to throw his gifts, delete his pictures, remove him from my YM list, scrap his SMSes, and even unsubscribe all the online networking portal associated with him? -- The things that I did not manage to do with my ex's stuffs.
I think I finally got the answer. Because I used to think that knowing him is the best thing that ever happened in my life. Stupid me. Yes, I regretted knowing him. Posted at 10:18 am by d.a.s.h Make a comment Permalink Tuesday, August 25, 2009
idiot poetic Dulu,
Kamu itu - gula, manis, sempurna, bidadari, - buat aku merasa seperti tercipta untuk pertama kalinya - Sekarang, Yes, you, idiot. Posted at 12:47 pm by d.a.s.h Make a comment Permalink Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Jerk-Ass
What's going on with my life? Are negativity attracted to me?
Being too naive is eating me alive. Here goes - I helped him, from 11 pm to 1 am. And from 8.30 am to 2.30 pm. It's office hours by the way. I sacrificed my precious office hour to help him. My work emblazoned with his name should be awarded with high precision and intricate details. I neglected my priorities for his bloody paper. And what did I get? After the strenious 8 hours, of 34 pages worth of project paper : "Aku tak dapat present Sabtu. Kena kerja. Korang go on je tanpa aku." As easy as that? Kalau kau dekat tempat aku pun pasti akan mengamuk badak. It hurts! It hurts! It hurts! That you sacrificed so much for something so worthless. Posted at 10:26 pm by d.a.s.h Make a comment Permalink Tuesday, August 11, 2009
T_T 1 month 17 days.
-baru- Ouh, dah kena marah dengan ketua jabatan. Siap dibandingkan lagi dengan staff lain. Sebab tak ada di pejabat masa hari Jumaat. Dan tak jawab phone masa hari Jumaat. Untuk panggilan bekerja hari Sabtu Ahad. Buat documentation, for audit day. My commitment is highly questioned. And compared. Ultimate -waddafak- moment. Waddafak sebab siapa yang nak kerja hari Ahad? Waddafak sebab aku dah bosan melahu dekat office, jadi aku ikut fellow teaching engineer pergi kilang proses cendawan, initial visit untuk research paper aku - dengan persetujuan DEKAN bai. Waddafak sebab tak ada info being cascaded to me on the audit activity. Waddafak sebab kena banding dengan orang lain yang memang dah lama duduk dekat lubuk tu. Ultimate waddafak adalah : langsung tak ada incoming call dari nombor pejabat mahupun nombor yang tidak dikenali yang tak dijawab - nak kata telefon aku tipu aku? Nah, check call list. Waddafak, kena marah pasal tu? Ok lah, seriously rasa macam nak menangis masa tu. My image has been tarnished gila babi. Lepas ni kalau jadi leader, pastikan - jangan bandingkan subordinate anda dengan subordinate lain - lu emo, simpan sendiri, tak payah nak sembur dekat aku. Meeting macam haram sampai 2 jam lebih tanpa specific output for each person. Hantar email terlalu general - tak ada orang nak ambil responsibility for general statement. Dan leader is about good POLC - Planning, Organising, Leading and Coordinating. Jangan main taik dengan aku, aku technical person yang ambil Management Studies. Dan aku kerja buat audit dekat setahun setengah. Jangan question commitment aku pada hari audit when no information has been succesfully cascaded. Terima kasih. Posted at 06:24 pm by d.a.s.h Comments (2) Permalink Secara rasmi
Now - this place sucks.
Big time. And my image is tarnished. Ultimately. p/s - poyo betul. Lif rosak pun nak inform dekat infonet. Tiga tingkat je pun! Posted at 09:33 am by d.a.s.h Make a comment Permalink Thursday, August 06, 2009
Now look who's talking "Tak kira. Kena habiskan sama-sama gak. Kalau grad pun, nak sebelah kau jugak. Kalau tak aku tarik jugak kau, aku ikat tangan kau, tak boleh lari mana-mana, kita naik pentas ambil scroll sama-sama. Tak kira apa jadi. Mesti sama-sama."
Which sends me of laughing - 1 year ago. Macam haram! 5-Aug-09, 10.21pm "Ello. Project paper kau dah siap hantar? Fizz sibuk tanya aku pasal kau. Aku dah bagitau dia, aku tak buat project paper dan aku taknak grad. Korang teruskan je la tanpa aku." And -- Why do you have to tell me that? --again? --after all the shit you spat? Diam lagi baik. Posted at 09:57 pm by d.a.s.h Make a comment Permalink Tuesday, August 04, 2009
Kenapa mereka wajar ditendang
10.00am
"Salam. Aku dah pos kan kau punya assignment and tutorial dekat Pn Len. Hope you graduate as the best student. Aku dah quit kay. Malas nak teruskan project paper tu. Good luck in your project paper presentation." Luck - has got nothing to do with this. Ni lagi sekor. Nak kena tendang teloq tu baru dapat belajar ke? Marah. Fact that you may not know - aku ambil program ini sebab kau. That you ended it this way makes me want to kick your groins and enjoy the pleasure of your cringing face. Loser -- 12.30 noon Sedang memujuk dia -- with carefully constructed words. Berdebar setiap kali dia reply. Couldn't hold back my laugh - rasa macam tengah pujuk budak kecik. No final say - yet. Hope it turns out well 2.00 pm Official, benci sama dia. Seronok kan main-mainkan orang perempuan? Posted at 09:34 am by d.a.s.h Make a comment Permalink Monday, August 03, 2009
You think you know them after 5 years? Think again... This is the story of the un-ending ex.
First, he crush the crystal keychain. Then I threw him out of my life. Then he beg to come back. And also begging of forgiveness. Then when finally I have the strength to ignore him, he went neeee-nooong.. He bugs my friend. Calling Dora perempuan murahan. And then went back home. And then felt sorry. But yet taking one after another dose of drug - kononnnya. And then thinking of saying sorry to Dora. And beg for forgiveness again. But went nee-noong again, threaten to make an alliance with Perempuan Rambut Karat. Suddenly, blackmailing me with our photos. And photo curi he took from my phone. and then cry for forgiveness again. And then suicidal threat. And then his sister told me he met with an accident. And he still lived. Then he wants to say sorry. And then jadi nee-noong balik, suicidal threat balik... Serius aku tak faham. Naik gila aku dibuatnya! Bangsat betul nak ganggu hidup aku sampai macam ni. Go get a life la, asshole! Malas sangat nak kerja, pergi duduk Tanjung Rambutan tu!!! Posted at 11:53 pm by d.a.s.h
Comments (2) Permalink Sunday, August 02, 2009
Why so serious? Ok - we had our first fight.
Not that we haven't fought throughout these years - it's just that this is one of the major fights - that I presume it as our first real fight. I mean - real as in, I drove away accelerating my car as loud as I can just to show my annoyance. And real as in he walk away without ever turning back. And real as in he didn't reply any of my SMSes up to this wee hour. Crap gile. I'm just too tired - covering up for him. And I'm so bad at saying 'NO'. And he sees my emotional behaviour as 'mengungkit' and breaking my promise of helping him. The concept of helping is that you actually 'assist' - not 'dump everything to the pig' kind of thing. I am seriously exhausted - and I just need somebody to share the burden - not add another load to the cart. I just need somebody to cheer me up. I just need somebody to whisper words that can put a smile to my face. I just need somebody that I care. I just need him to sit next to me. I just - want - him. That is all. And that is the kind of thing that you can't simply say out loud.
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